Thursday, April 28, 2011

Daddy

I had heard many stories of men who experienced sympathy pains or put on weight as their partners entered their last stages of pregnancy. I really did not believe it until this happened in our home.

When I was pregnant with our second child and nearing the end of term, it became quite obvious that my husband's waistline had begun to rival mine.

One morning while standing in the kitchen with our then three-year-old daughter, Courtney, we noticed that she had begun to eye us curiously. Though she had been frequently schooled about the arrival of her new baby sister, something seemed to confuse her. Courtney looked at her father, then looked at me. Again she returned her gaze to her father. Thoughtfully, and with all the seriousness a three-year-old could muster, she asked, "Daddy, when are you going to have YOUR baby?"

Lauren Broadbent
Chicken Soup for the Parent's Soul

I remember taking prenatal classes for my first preganancy and one of the activities were for the couples to compare their symptoms. The men and women split up to do the activity and later compared the list. It was hilarious but the men had similar to symptoms to the women expecting!

Of the things on their list were:
-Weight gain
-Mood swings
-Feeling lazy
-Eating for two

This goes to show that the energy of the people around us DOES effect us but more importantly we effect the people around us as well. While you might want to blame others for not being empathetic enough, remember it goes goes both ways. Try and remind yourself that its best for you and your spouse to be on the same team. They may not understand your symptoms (such as nesting) but they will try their best to hear your needs... you can make your needs more clear with effective communication. Tell them what you are thinking- remember they cannot read your mind. Work on a birth plan together and put your ideas on paper. It may help to have someone neutral like a Doula to guide your plans/conversation.

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